Friday, November 14, 2008

What's for Lunch?

One of the things that is just inherently different about this town than other (larger) towns is that everyone takes an hour lunch break. And I mean everyone. Between 11am and noon the entire town just shuts down while people take their lunch break. I was even told by a mechanic once to NOT bring my car in from 11-noon because no one would be there. Well, since everyone else leaves for lunch, Nick insists that we do the same thing. I guess he just wants to fit in with the cool kids. 

Surprisingly this is what I've been having a hard time adjusting to in Eufaula. It's not the hour long commute, or the new job (and its borderline minimum wage), or the people. It's the food. First of all, the options are extremely limited, there are probably a total of 20 restaurants in Eufaula, half of which are Fast Food joints. Second there seems to be a monopoly on any restaurant that serves any cuisine other than American. For example...

No. 1 Chinese Buffet
Aptly named, considering it is the only Chinese restaurant in Eufaula. They shamelessly display their "Readers Choice, Best Chinese Restaurant in Eufaula" Award from the Eufaula Tribune on the wall behind the cash register. This Chinese restaurant not only offers a full buffet, but it also has a menu with like 800 items on it. How they keep their kitchen fully stocked with all the ingredients for these different dishes I REALLY don't want to know. I also don't want to know how long that crab puff has been sitting out.

Old Mexico
Unless you count Taco Bell, this is the only "Mexican" restaurant in Eufaula, and I use the term "Mexican" loosely. The fajitas at Chili's are more authentic than the fajitas at Old Mexico. When you order "queso" at a Mexican restaurant in Austin you get a bowl of delicious golden cheese perfectly blended with peppers and tomatoes and piping hot. When you order "queso" in Eufaula you get what looks like a bowl of thick milk. It's just melted white cheddar, no peppers, no tomatoes, no deliciousness. I'm working on a theory about how the quality of Mexican food can be directly related to the distance from the Mexican border. Mexican food in Austin = amazing, flavorful, unique and f-ing delicious. Mexican food in Alabama/Georgia = terrible, bland, predictable and there are not enough margaritas in any establishment to change my mind about that. The Taco Bell's in Austin are even better. How is that possible, you ask? 3 words, Cheesy Gordita Crunch, the best (and only good) item on the Taco Bell menu. And as if I'm not being punished enough already, someone decided that the Taco Bell's in Alabama AND Georgia are not going to serve these delicious treats. Do they have every single ingredient for one sitting in the back of their kitchen? Yes. Will they make me one? NO!

Phil's Bar B-Que
Their slogan? "Best Butts in Town". Well hell, if that doesn't make you want to eat there then I don't know what would. I can't even begin the comparisons between this place and the Bar B-Que in Texas. However, compared to "Old Mexico" it's pretty good, but it could be better if it had one thing...Macaroni and Cheese. Do NOT confuse this with Macaroni Salad, I don't want that cold, stinky, mayonnaise or mustard covered crap on my plate. If I'm eating ribs or brisket or even chicken all I want is some Mac n' Cheese to go with it. 

Cajun Corner
Or I should say "Pagin' the Doctor Corner". The food served at this restaurant is so bad for you that it puts McDonald's to shame. I'm not sure who is in charge of portion control at the Cajun Corner, but my Blackened Chicken Alfredo does not need a pound of butter melted over it. Also, why is my pre-dinner bread sitting in a pool of butter and Cajun seasoning? And when did butter become the  number one ingredient in Buttermilk Ranch dressing? The chef at this restaurant needs a crash course in "Cholesterol 101". 

River City Grill
Without a doubt, this is the best restaurant in Eufaula. I'm am slightly surprised that it even exists. Today for lunch I had a salad with blackened Salmon, cranberries, candied pecans and a  balsamic vinaigrette that was made from scratch. Nick had a Cajun penne pasta with andouille sausage and chicken and a cup of creamy potato and ham soup. Both were delicious. They also bring you freshly baked rolls with a homemade cinnamon butter. We've been served by the same waitress so many times that she has started callus us "her regulars". 

Joe's Food Factory
Joe's has a buffet-style lunch where you can choose 1 meat and 3 sides or 1 meat, 2 sides and a dessert for about $8. The way that it works is you tell the person behind the counter what items you want and they load a plate up for you. Last time we went I chose the 1 meat and 3 sides option and as the cashier was ringing us up she looked at my plate, then looked at me and said "Gurl, you can eat!". I wasn't really sure how to respond to that comment so I just said "Thank You?" and sat down at our table. 
This is the other place where we find ourselves becoming "regulars". Tuesday's is our favorite day to go because they have some of our favorite items on the menu. When we walk in a waitress will take our drink orders and set a table for us while we get our food at the main counter. It has gotten to the point that when the waitress  sees us walk in she automatically gets 2 glasses of water and sets a table up for us in the corner by the window. Kinda creepy, kinda cool. 


Tonight is going to be interesting. Not only are Nick and I going to a new restaurant in Eufaula for dinner, we will be joined by 20 or so of his coworkers. We are going to The Creek Restaurant and Lounge which is about 5 minutes south of town. I've been told by my boss that I will leave the restaurant smelling like cigarettes and grease. It sounds delightful. 


3 comments:

Bill said...

Hey, nothing worse than smellin' like cigarettes and NOT grease!

Unknown said...

ohmygod GREAT POST

I want to visit all of these places.

MK said...

You guys are forgetting the cardinal rule in fine Alabama dining - we fry everything! Heads up for both of you - nearby Clio has the Chitlin jamboree which should give you a excellent culinary experience of local handmade souse and swine intestines fried in fish cookers - a local delicacy.
Glad your both still here!
John